Angry Intern is Back…and he’s got video

It’s only when you’ve had an incredibly huge project and subsequent regular duties done do you feel a sense of satisfaction that is unexplainable. Unfortunately I have been unable to do much with the blog (not that I have many viewers). For lack of something better to write about as of right now, here’s a great video forwarded to me by a co-worker.

Trade Shows (mostly the Teamsters) Suck

It’s hard to escape the fact that trade shows suck. Sure, lots of people look forward to shows like CEDIA (Consumer Electronics) and geeks love anything Microsoft or Sony decides to hype up, and for good reason. Trade shows, especially those that feature top-notch semiars, can be really fascinating for interns, especially if you get to hobknob with some guys that have been in the business for awhile and can give you some good insight. It’s a perfect opportunity to see the newest and best products, and to actually get a moment to get some hands-on time with really pricey equipment.

But when you’ve gone to trade shows for a while, they become some of the most grating, irritating places on earth. This year marks the third year that I’ve been going to trade shows and I, as an  intern, attend about eight a year.

And nothing like dealing with the Teamsters Union–those lazy jackasses that run the trade shows. Don’t get me wrong–I’m sure there’s plenty of people that work hard for the Teamsters–they just don’t work at trade shows. No, what you get at the McCormick Place in Chicago, for example, is a bunch of knuckle-dragging, waste-of-sperm neanderthal degenerates who know somebody that knows somebody that knows somebody, so they shouldn’t (and don’t) demean themselves to even lift a pinky to help (which is what they are hired for) and get utterly offended when you ask them to do so–or they mutter something and say “I’m on break.”

Fuck the Teamsters. I invite anyone to tell me one good thing about them…other than the fact that Jimmy Hoffa got what he deserved.

An Ode to My Cubicle

Anyone stuck in a cubicle for 1/3 of their adult lives will appreciate this one.

Avoiding the Boss

Note: The Angry Intern does not advocate avoiding work and/or dis-respecting superiors. However, sometimes we all need a little alone time, be it going “out back” for a cigarette, spending a minute or two extra in the lounge or strolling around the office aimlessly (but with a purposeful expression).  So go ahead, interns, take a minute to avoid the boss.

The Bane of My Existence 2: The Canon imageRUNNER C5180

This is the Canon imageRunnerC5180.

Looks like a fine piece of equipment, doesn’t it? Well, like the pretty girl with a terrible secret, appearances can be deceiving. This piece of plastic and metal horse manure will not recognize your files, will re-size copies for no apparent reason, will “jam” even though there is no paper jammed, will lose file paths and for some otherworldly reason, will never print the color green.

I want it to die…slowly, painfully…only then will I have satisfaction. You remember the scene from Office Space where they trash the fax machine in the field? Think that, only with hand grenades, a shotgun and a Soviet T-72 tank for good measure. I will scatter its ashes to the ends of the earth so it may never return again and spend the rest of eternity in perpetual limbo.

I feel better now.

‘cuz its die motherfucker, die motherfucker, die:

Fight DRM: Ten things you can do today

Posted by PoliTech:
“If consumers even know there’s a DRM, what it is, and how it works, we’ve already failed” – Disney Executive.

Defeating DRM is all about awareness.

The direct actions that we have taken are all about this. Today we are asking you to let the people around you know that DRM is bad for our society. Let’s create space for the debate. Do we want handcuffs and locks on art and knowledge? As our friends at Disney recognize, if there is this debate, we will have won.

Work your way through these actions (some or all) and spread the word that DRM is Defective By Design. Your target is to get the word out to at least 100 people today. and that is easier than you think. Just look at the ideas below and see that you can have some fun and have an impact on the future story of DRM.

Email your friends and family, use our prepared text. This is the big one – attack that address book!!

Add this text to your email signature for the day.


Post on a forum or message board that you subscribe to.

Download and print this sign and hang one at your desk, the office water cooler, or in an elevator.

Download and print this leaflet and give it to coworkers or others you see today, maybe even distribute them on your lunch hour or during your commute.

Sign the Bono petition. We are getting ready to get his answer.

Google bomb DRM by adding this link to your website or any web page you can edit.

Digg the day of action

Watch these videos on YouTube send them to friends and rate them.

Photograph your actions and post them to Flickr tagged with “dayagainst drm defectivebydesign”.

DRM

25 Signs That, Sadly, You’ve Grown Up

Posted by PoliTech, and found here.

1. Your house plants are alive, and you can’t smoke any of them.

2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.

3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.

4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.

5. You hear your favorite song on an elevator.

6. You watch the Weather Channel.

7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of hook up and break up.

8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.

9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as “dressed up.”

10. You’re the one calling the police because those damn kids next door won’t turn down the stereo.

11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.

12. You don’t know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.

13. Your car insurance goes down and your payments go up.

14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonalds leftovers.

15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.

16. You no longer take naps from noon to 6 PM.

17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.

18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle your stomach.

19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.

20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer “pretty good stuff”.

21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.

22. “I just can’t drink the way I used to,” replaces, “I’m never going to drink that much again.”

23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.

24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.

25. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn’t apply to you and can’t find one to save Your sorry old ass.

New Romances Make My Ass Twitch

 

I know this isn’t a new phenomenon, but what is it with the changing of the seasons and people suddenly getting the urge to find a “special someone?” It’s like a yellow leaf is an aphrodisiac.

All around the office co-workers are talking about “Oh, that really nice guy/girl I met at Borders/Barnes and Noble/some bar” or saying things like “We talked for four HOURS. ” And then a slightly older lady (still hot to trot, but a bit over the hill now) says “Oh…the fall. It just brings out the romance in us all.”

Gag.

Don’t get me wrong. I’ve had a “special someone” for four years now…no stranger to romance am I. But I refuse to accept the changing of the seasons as the impetus behind fall romance. It’s simply this–colder air brings people indoors. People congregate indoors. People get horny. People stay horny for each other for longer than a few days and now its romance.  I don’t get it. I just love watching romances implode.

Eleven Things You Did Not Learn In School

Posted by PoliTech:

This is not from Bill Gates (although it has been erroneously attributed to him by many). It’s an excerpt from the book “Dumbing Down our Kids” by educator Charles Sykes.

It is a list of eleven things you did not learn in school and directed at high school and college grads.

RULE 1
Life is not fair – get used to it.

RULE 2
The world won’t care about your self-esteem. The world
will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel
good about yourself.

RULE 3
You will NOT make 80 thousand dollars a year right out
of high school. You won’t be a vice president with
car phone, until you earn both.

RULE 4
If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a
boss. He doesn’t have tenure.

RULE 5
Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your
grandparents had a different word for burger flipping
they called it … Opportunity.

RULE 6
If you mess up, it’s not your parents’ fault, so don’t
whine about your mistakes, learn from them.

RULE 7
Before you were born, your parents weren’t as boring as
they are now. They got that way from paying your bills,
cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about
how cool you are. So before you save the rain forest
from the parasites of your parent’s generation, try
delousing the closet in your own room.

RULE 8
Your school may have done away with winners and losers,
but life has not. In some schools they have abolished
failing grades and they’ll give you as many times as
you want to get the right answer. This doesn’t bear the
slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.

RULE 9
Life is not divided into semesters. You don’t get
summers off and very few employers are interested in
helping you find yourself. Do that on your own time.

RULE 10
Television is NOT real life. In real life people
actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

RULE 11
Be nice to nerds. Chances are you’ll end up working for
one.

PoliTech is old enough to appreciate Rule #7 and #11
I also adjusted the dollar amount for inflation. I know, “Not Fair!”

The Beginning of the End of the World

We need brains, not brawns:

Musharraf to Karzai

Source: Indo Asian News ServiceIslamabad/New York, Sep 26 (IANS) In a calculated snub to President Hamid Karzai of Afghanistan, Pakistan President Pervez Musharraf has said ‘we need brains, not brawns’ in understanding the region’s environment.

“One has to understand the new environment and then finalise a strategy and take it to the stage of implementation,”Musharraf told a gathering of Pakistanis in New York.He said if there were no understanding of the environment, no strategy could be successful. The bone of contention has been the agreement that Musharraf’s government has signed with the tribal chiefs in Northern Waziristan, the hotbed of Al Qaida and Taliban activities. His remarks come two days before they are scheduled to meet together their common host, US President George W. Bush, when the region’s ‘environment’ would be discussed.

Bush, who has praised both the leaders for their role in fighting terrorism, has indicated that he would try to sort out the differences between the two South Asian leaders who have been engaged in frequent public spats.

US security experts have said that Pakistan’s deal with the pro-Taliban tribals would give a free run to the terror fugitives being hosted by the local tribes in Northern Waziristan.

Karzai has also complained it would give a free run to infiltration into his territory.

But Musharraf contends that he has been able to remove American ‘misconceptions’ during his meeting with Bush last week, when their ‘chemistry’ worked well.

The latest of the spats while both are in the US has been the whereabouts of Al Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden and the resurgence of Taliban.

Karzai says Pakistan is behind it, while Musharraf, who did a U-turn in his relations with the Taliban regime in 2001 after supporting it through men, money and material, now says Taliban’s rise was ‘rooted in Afghanistan’.

Little is known about Karzai’s US itinerary while by contrast, Musharraf is on a roller coaster visit, his longest ever, talking to American and Pakistani bodies and promoting his book.

Copyright Indo-Asian News Service

See? This is the beginning of the end. As soon as our “allies” turn on each other and start pointing fingers is when it REALLY starts to fall downhill. 

I’ve followed the Afghan-Pakistani situation for some time now. It all just seems like such an exercise in futility.

Oh well. That’s what we get for getting involved in cultures that we don’t understand. I actually have no valid, supportable opinion on the whole mess, other than Bush and Rummy are jackasses who allied themselves with the very same guy who supported (with men, weapons, funds, etc.) the Taliban. War makes for strange bedfellows, I guess. For now, enjoy this tasteful pic of the man we call a friend.